Tears of joy at ‘Strengthening Families’ graduation ceremony

--- Published on December 16th 2015 ---
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There were tears at the “graduation” ceremony for Natomas Unified’s Strengthening Families program this month –but they were tears of joy, as one by one, parents stepped forward to thank instructors for bringing them closer to their kids.

Jeremy, who attended with his wife and 12-year-old daughter, said he learned that “part of being a good parent is realizing you don’t have the skills to be a good parent.”

“It meant a lot to me,” Jeremy said of the 10-week program. “Thank you.”

Lisa said she grew up around a lot of yelling, screaming, and occasional hitting with a belt. Strengthening Families “helps us, so we don’t repeat the same patterns,” she said. “I feel real grateful.”

Robert said he realized the impact of Strengthening Families in its second week, when “there was a little yelling going on” and his kids reminded him not to yell, to instead use an “I feel statement,” a technique learned in class to express anger rather than act it out.

Twenty-one families graduated in this month’s ceremony, held at Natomas Middle School. Each had attended Strengthening Families for 2.5 hours per week, since October, with dinner and child care provided.

The free program is offered by NUSD’s Parent CORES in partnership with the National Council on Alcoholism and Drug Dependence (NCADD). Both parents and kids attended, meeting separately for the first hour each week to learn and discuss new skills, then gathering jointly for an hour to practice them as a family.

Strengthening Families is designed to help children develop better communication and social skills, solve problems, resist peer pressure, comply with family rules, understand their feelings, and learn the consequences of substance abuse. Not only do these skills strengthen relationships within families, they also are important in helping students meet NUSD’s Board-approved Vision that all high school graduates be “college and career ready, productive, responsible, and engaged global citizens.”

Strengthening Families aims to help parents set constructive limits, provide effective discipline, improve family communication, use attention and rewards to improve their children’s behavior, and understand negative factors that can impact family relationships.

Alma said the program reminded her that she’s not alone in parenting challenges – classmates expressed the same types of frustrations she felt. “Their struggles are similar to my struggles,” she said, adding that Strengthening Families has changed the way she relates to her son.

Another parent, Gary, said simply, “I’m going to miss you guys.”

To end the graduation ceremony, parents and kids each wrote down things that frustrate, anger, upset or bother them. They then rolled up their sheet of paper into a wad and tossed it into the air, then threw it away, symbolically ridding themselves of their burden.

Strengthening Families had ended, but for each family, a refreshing new start.

(Anyone interested in information about future Strengthening Families programs, or other NUSD parenting workshops, can contact Lisset Mijares at [email protected] or visit our website at https://natomasunified.org/departments/school-leadership-and-support/parent-cores/)